Dive into the World of Poems with WordSoup
I’ve tried to divide these up as best I can but to be honest it’s not a library so I just used the tried and trusted EM3 method (Eenie, Meenie, Minnie, Mo) to dish them out.
Let WordSoup drag you kicking and screaming through the torturous maze of poetic ramblings.
There is liberal use of profanity within quite a lot of these poems, if this isn’t your cup of tea (Yorkshire Tea, strong, drop of milk, thanks for asking) then thanks for stopping by, otherwise crack on.
Poems & Rants
The poems in this section are a bit ranty and definitely a bit sweary, if you don’t like profanity probably best to move along the bus.
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- Take A step Back
A poem about the spread of misinformation.
Click here to read - Fuck It, I’m Indecisive
A poem about, erm, not really sure!
Click here to read - Toilet Habits
The title says it all really!
Click here to read - Bastard Turkey
Christmas dinner preparation
Click here to read - Everyone Knows A Dickhead
Poem about that one person that almost everyone knows.
Click here to read - Knitting Circle
One woman’s fantasy
Click here to read - The Dishonourable Member
Thoughts about politics
Click here to read - Summertime
The great British weather.
Click here to read - Earworms
Annoyingly infectious jingles
Click here to read - Armchair Anarchist
A short poem about keyboard warriors
Click here to read - Coffee
A poem I was inspired to write whilst in high street coffee shop
Click here to read - For A Chance To Win £100
Rant about annoying customer service requests from shops.
Click here to read - Here We Go Again…..
A poem I wrote during a general election
Click here to read - Hillbilly Hip-hop
Exploring what elements of gangsta rap would look like in the realm of the hill dwellers
Click here to read - Bloke
Poem about one of those people that we all know.
Click here to read - Counting sheep
Insomnia and counting sheep
Click here to read - It’s All Kicked Off…….
The story of a small boy, a ball and a dog………
Click here to read - Road Rage
Poem about road rage
Click here to read - Decaf Latte Vanilla Shot
Thoughts about the price of coffee and a face hidden in plain sight.
Click here to read - Arseholes
Ever wonder how and why the world is full of arseholes? Me too.
Click here to read - Coat On!
Poem about rain, lots of it.
Click here to read - Boy Band
A poem about the dreams of being in a boy band.
Click here to read - HS2
Not really sure that this over budget, over politicised, needless project requires a description.
Click here to read - 9-2-5
Poem about life in a office
Click here to read - Why I Eat Chips
Poem exploring the issues of buying a sandwich when you have a food allergy.
Click here to read - Disconnected Connections
A poem about being remotely connected during Covid whilst yearning for the physical interaction.
Click here to read - A Bit Of Weed
Poem about student daze
Click here to read - Pringles Bladder
A poem about the that male phenomenon of pub drinking and the need for a piss
Click here to read - Pissed ‘n’ Broke
Poem about relieving teenage boredom with a quick adrenaline fix.
Click here to read
Not quite as sweary but possibly still ranty
These ones don’t definitely use the word ‘fuck’ in them (as far as I remember)
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- If Only
A poem pondering why we can’t do more.
Click here to read - Hamsters
A poem about the repetitive nature of life and work.
Click her to read - Standby
A poem about the infernal LEDs that occupy our lives
Click here to read - Circle of Life
A poem about love, life, loss and underpants.
Click here to read - Partly Political Broadcast
A poem about the nature of party political broadcasts, not about one party in particular but the faux bonhomie and rhetorical bollocks them.
Click here to read - Life’s Second Great Question
Pondering free WiFi access literally everywhere.
Click here to read - The American Dream
Guns and reasons to ban them
Click here to read - Greatest Thing Since Sliced Bread?
Exploring the impact of something useful
Click here to read - In Walk The Elected
The march of the idiots into power.
Click here to read - Computer Says No
The rise of the computer.
Click here to read - Digital Distraction
The blight of the mobile phone
Click here to read - It’s All Kicked Off…….
The story of a small boy, a ball and a dog………
Click here to read - Fairy
A poem I wrote for my daughter when she was about 5 or 6.
Click here to read - Cerebral Blancmange
Exploring the inner workings of my mind………..
Click here to read - Summertime
The great British weather.
Click here to read - Mid-Life Crisis
A poem about getting older, physically but not mentally.
Click here to read - Wet!
Poem about something that is wet.
Click here to read - Just Three More Sleeps
Exploring the ever increasing expense and expectation of Christmas
Click here to read - Charge Of The White Lightning Brigade
Exploring cheap booze and bored youths.
Click here to read - Shopping Centres
Exploring the soulless, shiny out of town shopping centres
Click here to read - A Bit More Choke
A poem about birth, the birth of a fart.
Click here to read - Bunfight At The Kerbside Corral
Poem about the power of the lollipop lady.
Click here to read - Drying Day
Poem about doing the washing with my grandma as a child.
Click here to read - Circles
A serious poem looking at the negativity in the world.
Click here to read - Armchair Anarchist
A short poem about keyboard warriors
Click here to read - Me
Some of the things that get on other people’s nerves.
Click here to read - On The Edge
Examining the black thoughts that irk in everyone’s mind.
Click here to read - Disconnected Connections
A poem about being remotely connected during Covid whilst yearning for the physical interaction.
Click here to read
Potentially Libellous
At some point in the future (if anyone finds them) the folk in suits might write me a stern letter asking me to edit or delete these.
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- Joseph’s Amazing Teflon Coated Overcoat
Exploring the corruption within FIFA
Click here to read - #MAGA
A few thoughts on The Donald
Click here to read - Ego-Testicle
Two words. Kanye West
Click here to read - Rootin’ Tootin’ Lootin’ Putin.
I wrote this poem a few days after the self-proclaimed Russian El-presidente invaded Ukraine.
Click here to read - Scrotumcupping Wankspangle
This was written during the run up to the US presidential elections, and then updated in 2024
Click here to read - Reductio Ad Absurdum
A poem written about Boris Johnson
Click here to read - A Single to Rwanda
A Single to Rwanda: Exploring the Controversial UK government policy of sending immigrants to Rwanda
Click here to read - Non-stop Politics
A dip into the murky world of UK Politics.
Click here to read
Random Shite
A collection of general stuff.
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- Fast Food
A poem about the laziness of not throwing litter in the right place
Click here to read - Fat Stan
Poem using only one vowel
Click here to read - Haiku - Sex
Does it need a description?
Click here to read - Haiku - Farts
Haiku about farts
Click here to read - Haiku - Politics
Haiku about politics
Click here to read
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