if you throw enough shit at a wall
some may stick and some may fall
but throw some at this Teflon prick
I bet my house bugger all will stick
he made up the rules as he went along
playing games with the assembled throng
he batted away critics with witty put-downs
with all the subtlety of the circus clown
whilst all around his supporters cheered
controlled by the hand of this puppeteer  
he came across as this bumbling fool
when really he was the sharpest tool
in the governments box of tricks
this mop haired idol of sleaze politics
“oh that’s soooo boris” we’d often hear
and that to me was the biggest fear
this slippery slope, this chosen path
was acceptance of this mop haired twat
the sleight of hand, the magican’s tricks
are front and centre of politics
and that masterstroke, the simple diverson
to any topic he had an aversion
incomplete sentences and Latin phrases
eviserate the content’s status
he danced and pranced and bobbed and weaved 
creating a shitstorm and getting us to believe 
that he should be trusted, that he should lead
and he’s the person who would succeed 
but his success wasn’t  for what he thinks
but the race to the bottom as this country sinks
from a nation of world renown
relegated to class clowns
whatever he did in this political quagmire
he elevated it to beyond satire
this bullshitting, blustering blonde buffoon
gave up politics, and not a moment too soon.